(For the first page of this material, click here.)
NO KID APPEAL
The following hotels, though each in some fundamental way lovely (well…mostly…), and wonderful to look at for adults, have essentially no architectural drama or adventure for children whatsoever.
You could consider them all to be tied for last; within price categories, they are ranked by the kid-appeal of their pools.
12. Disney’s Port Orleans Riverside’s (M) two areas are themed to be reminiscent of southern plantation and back bayou buildings, slightly exotic for children not familiar with the region. Its pool is famous, and is often ranked as the second most fun for kids at Walt Disney World. However, recent renovations at the Carribbean Beach pool put it ahead of Port Orleans.
13. Disney’s Yacht Club Resort (D) is subtly themed as a seaside resort. The pool that it shares with the Beach Club is the best at Walt Disney World
14. Disney’s Beach Club Resort (D) and Villas (DVC) is subtly themed as a seaside resort. The pool that it shares with the Yacht Club is the best at Walt Disney World
15. Disney’s Port Orleans-French Quarter (M) has features reminiscent of New Orleans. Guests have access to both their own pool and that at Riverside
16. Disney’s Grand Floridian Resort (D) is subtly themed as a seaside resort
17. Disney’s BoardWalk Inn (D) and Villas (DVC) is subtly themed as a seaside resort
18. Disney’s Old Key West Resort (DVC) is subtly themed as a seaside resort
19. Disney’s Saratoga Springs Resort (DVC) is themed to resemble the lakeside accommodations associated with the old watering and horse racing establishments of Saratoga Springs, New York (the hotels, not the stables), whose original designers back in the 1800s were highly influenced by designers of subtle seaside resorts.
The Treehouses at Saratoga Springs have a little more kid appeal, and remarkable inconvenience
20. Disney’s Fort Wilderness Resort & Campground (Other) is un-themed, but secretly wishes it were subtly themed as a seaside resort.
On-property, but not Disney, hotels: The Swan (thumbnail) and the Dolphin are visually not appealing, but rather appalling, and should have bags put over their respective signature sculptures.
David Koenig reports in Realityland: True-Life Adventures at Walt Disney World that because of contractual disputes, Disney CEO Michael Eisner had considered forcing these two hotels to be “ugly,” but that Disney president Frank Wells talked him out of it. I’m thinking Frank should have talked some more…
Shades of Green is essentially un-themed, and has no particular kid appeal.
MORE ON WHERE TO STAY AT DISNEY WORLD
- For where to stay, see this
- For your next best choices, in order, see this
- For picking your resort based on appeal to kids, see this
- For picking your resort based on convenience, see this
- For where not to stay, see this
- For what you get in each resort price category, see this
- For Walt Disney World resort price seasons, see this
- For resort reviews, see this
- For the value resorts, see this
- For the moderate resorts, see this
- For the deluxe resorts, see this
- For suites at the deluxe resorts, see this
- For the Disney Vacation Club (“DVC”) Resorts, see this
- For a (geeky) overview of comparative room size, see this
- Military/DOD families should look at this
- Families seeking the most comfortable place to stay should see this